


I can't make you love me (but I'll try)

by loveshua



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Bonding, Drunken Confessions, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Relationship(s), Platonic Relationships, Recreational Drug Use, Underage Drinking, side gyuhan, side verkwan - Freeform, side wonhui
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-08-22 18:08:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16602980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveshua/pseuds/loveshua
Summary: joshua and minghao learn how to forgive, forget, and rebuild.





	I can't make you love me (but I'll try)

The sun shines down, brighter than normal. The birds chirp with delight as the wind blows ever so elegantly, the breeze giving off a cool feeling. Not a cloud is seen in the sky. Children hurry out their houses in hopes of catching the ice cream trucks, coins jiggling in their palms, their mothers watching from the porches. Dogs strut happily across the sidewalk, the ground cool on their paws. People drive their cars with the hood down, everyone in the direction of the beach or nearest water park. The smell of barbecues fill the noses of many and the sound of laughter fills ears everywhere one walks.

While the neighborhood is bouncing with life and happiness because of the weather, not everyone's enjoying it. A few houses down where the ice cream truck usually stops, a block away from where the barbecue is taking place, next to the largest palm tree on the street, a very irritated boy and his best friend sit in his living room.

Joshua Hong rises quickly from his seat, nearly spilling his fruit punch in the process. He trips over his own two feet, setting his cup messily on the coffee table in front of him as he scrambles to the kitchen, which is now filling with smoke. His mouth spills out profanities as he opens the oven, finding his pizza to be charred black.

Great.

"Fuck." He says, throwing the tray onto the counter, slamming the oven door shut and opening the windows in the kitchen. "Pizza's burnt." He says loud enough for his best friend, Hansol Chwe, to hear him.

With red hazy eyes, Hansol walks slowly into the kitchen, one hand on his stomach and the other in his hair. "So takeout?" He asks, his voice with a slight rasp to it.

Joshua shrugs, knowing there's no other choice for them. Joshua can't cook (obviously) and Hansol's way too high to even function. Joshua grabs the stack of takeout menus he's accumulated over the years and lets Hansol pick what he wants to eat.

"Mmm, Chinese sounds good. Oh man. I'm hungry." Hansol puts a finger on his lips, "I want some burgers. Where's that burger place that serves those burgers? You know. The burgers..."

"You mean, every burger joint around here? Be more specific, Hans." Joshua crosses his arms, already sensing a headache forming. Burning his pizza interrupted him from getting as high as Hansol, and now he's gotta face the real world around him.

"Shit man, chill. I don't even remember what it's called... I still want pizza." Hansol stretches his hand out, holding a menu. Joshua takes it, pulling out his phone and wallet as he looks over the menu. He already knows what the two of them want though, seeing as they've ordered so many times before and the people who own the restaurant know Joshua and Hansol by name, but it doesn't hurt to look through again.

Just as Joshua's wrapping up his order, he spots from the corner of his eye a very stoned Hansol walking over to the black charred pizza. Joshua sighs deeply, watching as Hansol takes a piece and shoves it in his mouth, only to spit it out in the sink two seconds later.

"Man, that was terrible." Hansol pouts, crossing his arms as he walks back to the living room.

"Yeah, no shit." Joshua replies, sitting back down next to Hansol, "the food will be here in like 30 minutes."

Hansol lays his head on Joshua's shoulder, "How much?"

"Don't worry about it. I got it." Joshua tells him.

"Good, because I'm broke. Wasted it all. Not getting paid till next week. Wasn't gonna pay anyways." Hansol giggles, making Joshua roll his eyes. He shoves Hansol off of him and huffs.

A part of him is ready to ask why he was here in his house, on a Friday afternoon when Hansol's supposed to be at school and Joshua's supposed to be at work, until Joshua realizes he was the one who called Hansol over in the first place.

Joshua had called Hansol in a panic. With his hands shaking and his voice breaking, at 2am. Joshua knew Hansol was up, his normal bedtime usually being around 3am, and he was the first person he could think of calling that wouldn't completely blow him off. Even better for Hansol, he had a reason to not go to school that day. If it was regarding Joshua, Hansol considered it a legitimate reason for being absent, even if the school system disagrees.

Joshua's reason for panicking? That's still unknown to Hansol.

Joshua had called two times before Hansol had picked up, already in more of a panic by the 2nd call than anything else. When Hansol finally answered, background music from a video game he was playing, Joshua could only speak in jumbles of words.

"Yeah?" Hansol had asked over the phone, shoving potato chips down his throat like his life depended on it. He almost choked when he heard Joshua's desperate voice over the phone, begging for him to come over. Hansol didn't give it a second thought, he had been up and out of the living room, where he had been seated, in a matter of seconds.

With Joshua still on the phone, Hansol grabbed what he thought he needed. He grabbed a few snacks, the special ones for moments like these, and of course, a bag of the best stuff he bought that week.

He had only hung up on Joshua when he reached his house, which didn't take long seeing as the two live directly across each other.

When Joshua opened the door, Hansol had been stunned by the way his best friend looked. Hansol didn't know what had become of Joshua, when they had only been out of each others presence for about two days.

Joshua's eyes were puffy and red, his nose and cheeks were a hue of pink and his hair was a mess. His shoulders drooped, and he looked like he spent a fair amount of time either crying, throwing up, or both.

Hansol, being the concerned best friend he is, immediately sat Joshua down and interrogated him for almost two hours after that. Obviously disliking the situation, Joshua tried his hardest to change the direction of the conversation. Hansol didn't understand why Joshua all of a sudden wanted to change the subject, when he had been the one to call him over in the first place.

Deciding it'd be best for Joshua to shower, eat, and have a good nights rest, then tell him what was going on, Hansol had practically forced Joshua into the bathroom.

"You smell like shit." Hansol had commented, his nose wrinkling as he shoved Joshua into the shower, the older boy quietly protesting before going quiet as the hot water hit his aching back.

Hansol had stayed in the bathroom with Joshua, wanting to make sure Joshua didn't do anything stupid, like accidentally fall and break his wrist. It'd happened before... Joshua was unpredictable when upset.

After Joshua had gotten dried up, Hansol had sat him down at the kitchen table, declaring he'd make the two some pizza. But as Hansol was getting ready to heat up the oven, he heard light snores coming from the table. And when he turned, he found a sound asleep Joshua.

Like the good best friend Hansol is, he picked Joshua up and carefully set him down in his bed, wishing him sweet dreams with a small peck on the forehead.

At least, that's what Hansol wants to think happened.

What really happened involved Hansol attempting to pick Joshua up, but dropping him in the process, causing him to fall as well. Joshua had woken up in a daze, groaning as he felt a pain in his arm, and then another near his rear. When he turned, he found Hansol's foot literally up his ass. Joshua had huffed, pulling himself up and complaining the whole way to his room, leaving Hansol scrambling after him.

But to Hansol, both scenarios were basically the same. And he gets points for trying.

When the two had woken up, with Hansol falling asleep on the uncomfortable armchair in Joshua's room, Joshua was back to what Hansol assumed was his routine for the past couple days.

He stayed in bed, his whole body engulfed with blankets and the only sign of life being the light sniffles coming from inside the cave of blankets. Joshua's crying is what woke Hansol up.

Still, even after 20 minutes of coaxing, Hansol had no answer as to why his best friend looked and acted like a complete train wreck.

Opening the blinds in Joshua's room is what pissed him off enough to get up and move himself downstairs to the living room couch. Hansol had figured that was progress.

It was only when Hansol began rolling a joint that Joshua began showing signs of life. He scooted closer to Hansol, taking the lighter he had on the coffee table and eyeing both Hansol and the joint.

"Calm down, dude. I got you." Was all Hansol told Joshua.

Minutes later, Joshua got up from the couch, looking at the pizza that was still on the counter, before popping it in the oven. Already growing agitated by the minute, Joshua had to will himself not to snap at the kids next door who were laughing and playing in their backyard. He sat back down next to Hansol.

Only 20 minutes later, and here they are now.

Joshua closes his mouth, before opening it again, looking at Hansol and then at the floor, "Hey, Sol..." He starts off, but already regrets his decision when Hansol looks at him. A giggle erupts from Hansol and Joshua crosses his arms, "Nevermind..."

Hansol's gasping for air, flailing his arms in the air and muttering gibberish in Joshua's ear. Joshua just watches, gaining a small speck of amusement watching his best friend ride his high and make a fool out of himself in the process. Damn Hansol, always making him laugh no matter how he's feeling.

"Dude, I'm baked as shit."

☆☆☆

Joshua gets a text as he's on his 3rd slice of pizza, the vibrating slightly shaking the coffee table it was on. Hansol looks at Joshua's phone, reaching to grab it. Joshua drops his pizza quickly and slaps his hand away, staring at Hansol's greasy hands. Hansol sticks his tongue out at Joshua, throwing some crumbs at Joshua as he's grabbing his phone.

"Who is it?" Hansol asks, licking his fingers obnoxiously, making sure to smack his lips in the process. He knows how it annoys Joshua.

Joshua chooses to ignore Hansol's noises though, not paying any attention to the finger licking and smacking and the annoying drawn out moans of delight as Hansol finishes his food. Instead, he answers Hansol's question, "Jeonghan."

"What did he want?"

Joshua shrugs, closing his phone and setting it back on the coffee table, "I don't know. Didn't bother to check. He can wait."

Hansol raises an eyebrow, looking at Joshua, then his phone, "What if it was important...?"

Joshua pokes at his food, "If it was important he would've called me."

A moment of silence falls upon the two boys, until Hansol asks the question Joshua's been dreading answering, "Why were you crying?"

Joshua doesn't answer his question, staying quiet and only fueling Hansol's curiosity.

"You can tell me." Hansol whispers, making Joshua take in a long breath of air.

"I've just been having a bad few days." Joshua tells Hansol.

Even in his state, Hansol can tell that something has really affected Joshua deeply. If it was something small, he would have already told Hansol. It's unlike Joshua to wait this long to tell Hansol something that's bothering him.

"Something happened, didn't it?" Hansol asks, already knowing the answer. He can read Joshua better than anyone else, being friends with someone for almost 8 years does that to you.

Joshua nods, not wanting to look at Hansol.

Before anyone can make another sound, there's a knock on the door. Joshua lets out a long sigh, before getting up and checking the small peephole in his front door. After looking through it for a couple of seconds, he quickly walks away, heading into the direction of his room.

"Who was it?" Hansol asks, getting up himself, quite confused at Joshua's behavior. 

"Jeonghan. Open it. Tell him I'll be down in a few." Joshua calls from upstairs, causing a few huffs to come out of Hansol. He does what he's told anyways, when he opens the door Jeonghan practically comes charging in.

"Woah, calm down my guy. What's the rush?" Hansol says slowly, watching as Jeonghan circles the living room and kitchen, in a poor attempt to find Joshua. Hansol scoffs when he spots Jeonghan looking behind the fridge. For a psychology major, Jeonghan could be pretty dumb at times.

"Where is he?" Jeonghan asks rather impatiently, "he hasn't spoken to me since the party."

"So two days ago?" Hansol figures out, 'he'll be out in a little. He just woke up and he's getting ready."

"It's," Jeonghan checks his watch, "12 in the afternoon and he just woke up? What's up with him?"

Just as the words leave Jeonghan's mouth, footsteps begin going down the staircase, Joshua eventually coming into view.

He's looking better than ever to Hansol, with his hair done nicely and actually wearing something other than sweatpants and a dirty t-shirt. He looks like the regular Joshua to Hansol.

"What's up with you, Shua? Why haven't you been texting me?" Jeonghan asks as soon as Joshua makes his way to the two boys. He sounds like he's trying his hardest not to sound hurt, but his voice betrays himself when his voice begins to crack as he's speaking.

Joshua feels terrible. Here he is, sulking in his home and acting like a spoiled brat over a minor predicament he got himself into. Worst of all, here he is making his best friend seem like he's at fault. 

It wasn't Jeonghan's fault, how could he have known. Hell, no one knew, so Joshua doesn't know why he's acting like this.

After all, he brought it onto himself.

"Fuck... I'm sorry, Han. I really am. I... haven't been feeling the best since the party. I think I ate something... maybe you got some bad liquor. Haha, you know I'm a lightweight." Joshua lies through his teeth, and he can tell by both Jeonghan and Hansol's facial expressions that he didn't do a very great job at lying. He can see Jeonghan debate with himself, probably about whether to call Joshua out or not. 

Joshua's thankful when he sees Jeonghan decide against whatever he had wanted to say. His mouth that had been open slightly, ready to slip out a smart remark towards Joshua's statement, had now closed.

It's not Jeonghan who comments about Joshua's false statement, though.

"That's a lie, and you know it." Hansol says quietly, causing Joshua's face to drop. 

While it seemed the other way around, Jeonghan was actually almost always the one to hold back what he wanted to say just to spare Joshua's feelings. Joshua was the only person who ever got that special treatment, besides Jeonghan's sister, who Jeonghan adored and wouldn't ever want to hurt her feelings.

Jeonghan was usually always the one who would be on Joshua's side for everything, even if it didn't align exactly with what he himself was thinking. He just loved Joshua like that. 

Hansol, on the other hand, always gave Joshua the cold hard truth. He knew that Joshua was the type to keep all his feelings to himself, and in the end he would hurt himself more than needed. So Hansol would almost always set his foot down, making sure Joshua knew he had to speak in order for his problems to be resolved. 

Joshua always knew how Hansol was, and he knew how Jeonghan was. While Jeonghan was the one to say things in Joshua's favor, there's always a limit.

This just so happened to be Jeonghan's limit.

Jeonghan pouted, looking at Hansol and back at Joshua, "Don't lie to me, Joshua. Please tell us what's wrong."

Joshua didn't say anything for a moment. He has two options; he come clean and tell his friends everything that's been going on with him, or... he lie again. 

Joshua decides on the latter. "I'm not lying. I just don't feel so good, Han."

Jeonghan and Hansol both look at each other, knowing that what Joshua was saying isn't true, but they both decide not to press the subject further, for Joshua's sake. If he wasn't saying what was wrong, it must be something too personal and too close to home for him to confess right away. But all three of them knew that Joshua had to say what was up soon enough. There's only so many days Joshua can spend at home completely isolated from life before someone else questions what's up with him. Joshua knew that. Jeonghan and Hansol were silent, they were both planning on figuring out a way to get Joshua to speak. Joshua's prepared for that, he just needs time. 

"Alright." Jeonghan breaks the silence, "I was hoping you had answered my texts sooner, because we had made plans for us to go to the fair in a few days. We were wondering if you wanted to come."

"We?" Joshua asks, and Jeonghan nods.

"You know, basically the people who went to the party. Jun, Mingyu, Kwan... I can't really remember everyone right now. Everyone is trying to spend time with each other before they go on actual vacation or back home."

It's a few weeks shy of summer vacation, meaning all of Joshua's friends were going to be gone on vacation for a while. Hansol and Jeonghan weren't ones to travel, though, so while their families were busy travelling all summer, they found entertainment in bothering Joshua for the whole summer. Joshua wasn't one to travel as well, his parents were always gone for work related purposes, meaning Joshua always had the house to himself for a couple months before the school year started up again. Joshua's supposed to be in school, but after he graduated he decided to take a gap year, except this gap year has been going on two years long and Joshua doesn't see himself furthering his education at the moment. 

Joshua's best friends are different, though. After graduating Jeonghan went straight to university. He wants to be a therapist, and despite acting rather dumb with his friends, he's quite gifted. Jeonghan likes helping people.

Hansol however, is still in high school. It's his last year, and he can't wait until he graduates. He's still not sure what he wants to do though, so he might just take a gap year with Joshua, since everyone's pretty damn sure Joshua isn't going anywhere near a campus for a long time.

"When are you all going?" Joshua ask, not realizing he had spaced out for a moment. He's been doing that for a while now.

"We were actually waiting for you to say if you were free. We can go whenever, we just need you to confirm you're coming, or something." Jeonghan answered, seeming almost nervous to ask Joshua to go out with friends. It's understandable, the nervousness. After all, Joshua did ignore Jeonghan and everyone else, minus Hansol, for the past few days.

"Are you going?" Joshua asks, looking at Hansol, who nods.

"Obviously," Hansol starts, taking a seat on the couch, "come on, it'd be good for you to hang with us for the day. Maybe it'd bring some life back into your face."

Joshua contemplates it for a minute, looking down at the floor, then around at the walls, studying the pattern on the paintings hung up, all from different locations his parents had visited.

Joshua shrugs, "Let me know when it is, and I'll go."

Jeonghan's face lights up, glad to get his friend back into the swing of things.

**Author's Note:**

> it's been so long since i've written something on here. i hope i did well enough for you all to bare with me and my already terrible updating schedule. i'll try to update every week - but that may change. other characters will be introduced, i just wanted to introduce joshua, sol and jeonghan... aka joshua and his tormentors for the whole fic. i hope you enjoy and wait for the next update (spoiler: joshua actually goes outside) - ly ♡


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